Why must it always be me???
I never understood why things will happen in this way...
Though I'm not the first to know her...
but end up... I have fallen in love with her...
but the problem lies not in me loving her but it's my friend...
both of us love the same person... and she too cant decide which one of us is suitable for her..
I always thought if I should compromise again but this time I really wish to be selfish...
4 yrs... time past and it's been so long since i last felt this feeling....
I wish for her to stay by me... though i keep thinking i might not be able to get a wish come true...
i've been trying to get myself drunk today but still it doesn't work.... in the end...
i cant get myself drunk...
sometimes i really hate myself... i really hate it when i have to compromise...
i really hate it when i have to give up my happiness for others...
but i know i am too soft for this...
i just hate it when i cannot be cold hearted...
This time... i just wanna hold her close in my arms....
to look after her... to give her the best i could... even if it means me losing everything...
i will still provide her the best that i can give.... even if she does not choose me...
i will still stay at the back... looking out for her... and keep her going strong...
when she fall... i'll be there to hold her...
even though i promised her to never let her go... i really do hope i can keep to the promise...
I really dun wish to hurt or see her get hurt... cause i know i really wanna cherish her...
I just dun wanna lose her... i just dun wanna lose anyone anymore...
especially the person i love the most...
I really dun mind getting hurt once more.... getting hurt by her... is the worst possible thing to happen but i was accept it gracefully cause loving someone is to give her the best happiness and to see her being happy... this is all i can ever wish for if i am not the one she will love...